I just wanted to ask for prayers. I am finally breaking down and going to get tests done for my back. I've had back pain off and on since I was 16 yrs old. I've had good times and bad times.....
The last 2 months have been constant, severe pain.....no good days this time. It's painful to lift the kids....it's painful to walk....I'm having a hard time sleeping....I'm grouchy and irritable and have no patience left in me. I'm tired of hurting.......I'm tired of taking ibruprofen constantly.
But mostly, I just want to be able to play with kids without hurting.
I know God has purpose in this and I'm believing He can heal my back of whatever has been causing issues for so long. 10 years ago, the back xrays showed the beginnings of arthritis. I'm praying for a report of only that getting worse instead of bulging discs, etc......
I'm fighting fear that I won't be able to have kids again because after both pregnancies, it got much worse. And I believe if we're creating kids, I should be able to take care of them. I know there are so many worse things out there. I know there is a family in our community with 7 kids and their Daddy is has brain cancer. I know a classmate who is undergoing chemo. So many more are struggling with worse. But I think because this has gotten worse over the years....I'm starting to realize the pain may never go away.....and I should just quit whining and buck up.
But it's making me tired.......draining physically and emotionally.
So to all my prayer buddies out there.....I just ask for prayer that I can keep on keeping on with a smile and no grumbling and accept whatever the outcome may be. Tonite I'm gonna lay my fears at the Cross....and try to leave them there.
'Fear not' is stated in the Bible 366 times. That's one 'fear not' for every day of the year, with one extra left over for those really hard days." I'm trying not to think about all the reasons of what could be causing the pain to get worse. I'm honestly trying to put my whole faith in God.
"You and I were created to live by faith, and in God, we have all the power we need for a faith that is stronger than all our fears."Most of what we worry about never comes to pass but we insist on tormenting ourselves anyway." ~Micca Campbell (An Untroubled Heart)
4 comments:
I got you covered in prayer =) As a fellow pain sufferer (not my back, my neck) I did the same thing you did. Got tired of the pain and decided to try and find out what was going on. I know what you mean about being grouchy, tired of hurting, and wanting to be able to play with your kids. Let me know how it goes =)
Said a prayer for you, my friend. Let me know how your app't goes. I wasn't sure when it is scheduled for.
Hope
I'm a fellow back pain prayer warrior Laura. Though for me I've had to learn to do things different and I mean different for me...to make it. When I don't obey I can tell. I was not in on the surgery part...so make due with each day. I hope your back is something that you can take care of with slight modifications. Take care my sweet friend and please let us know how you are doing and what happens at yoru appt. I'm praying for you.
you will be in my prayers. When is the apointment please keep me up to date.
love ya Jennifer
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