I read this on my friend's blog today:
"I remember the days of old;
I meditate on all Your works;
I muse on the work of Your hands.
I spread out my hands to You;
My soul longs for You like a thirsty land.
Answer me speedily, O Lord;
My spirit fails!
Do not hide Your face from me,
Lest I be like those who go down into the pit.
Cause me to hear Your lovingkindness in the morning.
For in You do I trust;
Cause me to know the way in which I should walk,
For I lift up my soul to You.
...In You I take shelter.
Teach me to do Your will,
For You are my God;
Your Spirit is good.
...Revive me, O Lord, for Your name's sake!
For Your righteousness' sake bring my soul out of trouble."
~Psalm 143
I have failed again today in "mothering and wifing".
Gabe had his stubborn attitude, did very bad things over and over again...
Made many messes...fell on his sister and made her cry...threw a crying fit and threw
up all over the living room floor, the big bean bag, his clothes....dumped water everywhere....
poured baby shampoo in i don't know where all yet...hit me...threw food on the floor...wouldn't eat his veggies...whined many, many times.....climbed up on the coffee table multiple times....found some important backup cds in the computer armoire and smudged them up good....tried messing with the buttons on the printer....stood up on the kitchen chairs many times....and when Jason got home, I took it out on him.
Why? why can't i be supermom? why can't i just be patient? why can't i just be soft spoken? Why can't I be slow to anger?
Why couldn't I just get it together? Why do I take it out on my husband?
Only by God's grace will I get thru this season...and remember that it is sufficient enough for me.
And that His mercies are new every day...*sigh* Thank You Father!
Gabe also gave me many hugs and kisses and cuddles today.....he gave me many adorable smiles and told me many stories in his language. He did eat all his other food even if he didn't eat his veggies. He did take his bath very well tonite. He did play great a couple times today by himself. I do love him so very muchly...and tomorrow is another day to get up and try again.
Hava great rest of the weekend!
Love n Hugs...Laura
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